~Toonces Take the Wheel~
Let me just put this out there…I’m not in a blogging mood. In fact I’m in no real mood to communicate at all. BUT I’m going to let it all out any way. Just like I normally do. This may not be funny but I know some of you can relate.
Today I’d like to vent a little bit as well as throw some transparency your way. Today hasn’t been the most pleasant lap this world has ever taken for me. In fact, I’m feeling a little anxious. For those who don’t know me well I have suffered from anxiety, depression and anger for most of my adult life. Really, the anxiety has been manifesting as long as I’ve been able to formulate a thought. These are issues that everyone deals with at some point in life. We all have particular anxieties that we suffer from and at times are depressed. Some of you may or may not be able to relate to the anger part of this. Anywho, today I feel like I’ve lost it…Like the world has brought me to the pinnacle of worldliness and just stopped. In other words I feel OUT OF CONTROL!
Days like today make me feel like one of the most beloved Saturday Night Live characters of all time. That’s right, you guess it: Toonces … Toonces the “Driving Cat”. For those of you who are not familiar you’re about to get some ed’yo’cay’shun. Toonces was a cat that could drive a car. That’s right! Drive……..A……Car. Usually started off doing very well but inevitably driving off a cliff somewhere and bursting into flames. He usually just drove around characters and guest stars like Billy Joel in the skit and then WAW’BAM! KA’BLOOIE! The car was in flames.
My day today has certainly felt like a ride with Toonces. Hasn’t been the worst day I have ever had but Calgon is calling my name! “Take me AWAY!”. Any of y’all having a day like that today?
Today is one of those days where it’s very hard for me to live out my faith. In fact we discussed this in our Growth Group/Small Group Sunday. Sometime’s – Some days we just don’t want to give up that control of our life. We just don’t feel like being Christians. Is that natural? I don’t know…Probably. The times when I feel so far out in left field are the time when I refuse to pray about an issue. Think there is a reason I feel so lost and out of control? That should be an AHA! moment, but most of the time sadly it’s not. I tend to beat myself up for a day or so until the next issue arises. I know for a FACT there are people reading this that feel the same way…And not just one person.
I just completed “Crazy Love” by Francis Chan and now i’m working on “Radical” by David Platt: If you haven’t read them or listened to them, you need to! Both of these books are and have convicted me…Things I thought I surrendered I have not…Or I’ve only partially done so. I KNOW there are people who can relate to that as well. Not just avg. Christians but people I call SUPER CHRISTIANS…And I know a few. While this is somewhat comforting that I/you are not the only one don’t let it be grounds for acceptance or false comfort. We’re all sinners and don’t really deserve the Grace we get.
As Christians we hear that term “Die to thyself daily”…How many of really do that? I know I don’t. That makes me feel like pure garbage and it also keeps my ability to grow and I believe it truly limits my blessings. I’ll be the first one to tell you that I’m horrible at this…It’s tough to lean totally on Christ, especially in this country because we have so much materialism to take our minds off of what we really need to be focused on. With that being said on days like this the one thing I need to remember is Grace. Grace…Spell it out with me G-R-A-C-E…Grace. The Grace we receive from Christ is something I cannot understand and that’s one thing that I want to wrap my mind around but just can’t. But I’m SOO very thankful for it and thankful that I don’t have to understand it.
So on days when Toonces seems to be driving you around…Just remember that God’s grace is sufficient!
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
I know this is more preaching than I normally subject y’all to but I had it was meant to come out.
Until the next slip of the tongue, Thank you for visiting “Gullible’s Travels”
The Loose Cannon